Find Out How To Defeat That Damaging Monster Called Jealousy

Les came to me a couple of months ago, terrified that his partner was having an affair. They were having problems, and she was spending more and more time out of the house, apparently out with friends.

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Les didn't believe her for a second, and spent the time stewing at home, dialing her cell phone number, and on more than one occasion, traveling around to see if he could see her on an outing.

When she came home, she'd be given a relentless grilling, and with time she shut him down completely. Communication dried up, and the relationship was, it appeared, all but over.

When the girl of your dreams does call you, you move heaven and earth to hang out with her. So what if we had earlier plans to go out with friends on Friday night?

He looked dreadful: tried, overwrought and overweight. His skin was bad, his breath was unpleasant, and he displayed all the classic signs of a man who was being eaten up, internally.

Nobody wants a jealous partner and nobody likes being jealous. So how come a lot of people are?

In my experience there are a number of reasons, but the primary cause is really a breakdown in communication, and this typically occurs for one of two reasons:

Something is different, and for some reason you do not feel in a position to communicate openly and honestly anymore.

Or perhaps one or both partners are manipulating their power by withholding information out of anger, hurt or even just plain thoughtlessness.

Both cases create communication "black-holes" that are then quickly filled with fear, fury and fantasy.

When you are jealous you suppose the worst. So how do you handle these awful feelings of jealousy? How do you deal with a spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend who is jealous?

First if you are jealous, you have to communicate. You have to stop assuming the worst and ask questions. Open up the lines once more. Do not be aggressive, defensive, confrontational or even prickly.

Second, and just as important, you have to stop looking thirsty for reassurance. How on earth can she respect you, if you don't respect yourself enough to control your fears and paranoia?

Thirdly, you need to remind yourself why you're together in the first place, and realize that a relationship is only worth keeping alive when you can trust one another. If that trust is lost forever, then maybe it's time to move on.

Remember, jealousy is demeaning and humiliating. It is a sign of weakness and fear. In the end the fastest way to kill the monster has absolutely nothing to do with your partner, and almost everything to do with you.

Perhaps you might want to take a break from being in a relationship to check in with yourself and build up your confidence. Reconnect with the world and learn how to pick up women and chat with women. The fast and easy way to pick up a woman is to use dating tips on the internet.

Romance may be the spice of life. It is not hard to imagine how dull and boring life would be without romance.

Whenever you have terrific self-esteem, jealousy has absolutely no choice but to pack it's bags, and leave town!

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